I didnt know of or ever heard of this phrase

Until it happened to me in many ways

The end of a marriage of 25 years

The man I once knew giving what he thinks I deserve

Despite the fact I did most of it alone

Despite the fact he was never at home

Despite him cheating on me after 2 months wed

Despite him pushing me downstairs where I hit my head

No concern then for the unborn child

The child I held to my breast day and night

Where he took no part in fact said “I looked a sight”

Yes I did with my sour milk stained bra

My left over tummy from growing our star

How could he look at those cupid lips

Those beautiful eyes and tiny finger tips

Moaned about having to travel to work

Moaned about the car and going so far

Moaned about the wages and families and stuff

In fact moaned about everything including us.

We changed area, he changed his work place

From then our demise became more haste

At first I moaned and moaned for years

Held by his father whilst in floods of tears

Told by his sister to spend more time with me

Told by his father, children growing he should see

Sadly his dad came to an untimely end

Sadly I have also lost almost every friend

What should have I done?  Leave when they were young?

Not leave at all, be the burden I had become.

My illness played havoc with my mind

Depression, low self esteem and feeling a bind

I had no purpose, I had no place, I was not attracted

To him, his personality, or his face.

Yet I remember when I loved him for being kind

In Ryton he left those aspects behind

He lost a wife, who he never noticed was there

I lost my home, my parents, my children, my share

I would never have believed I could be punished so hard

So many years without even a birthday card

My father taught God forgives whatever the sin

But of course Dad picked and chose what he believed of him

I now thank my blessings, I found in time you see

The people who would stand by me

Those are the people deserving of Blessings from God

Not those who wave their angry rod.

The old saying What goes around has punished, its been real rough

Your turn will come, dont run to me when the going is tough

Like another in my family I too hold the view

If you dont want me in life, then in death I dont want you.

It is surprising that at least 2 of my ex’s family do write

To me regularly, obviously those with more insight.

When the time comes when those once loved die

Not a tear will I shed from any of my eye.

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